Six Word Summaries: Classic Literature

For an entire [separate] blog’s worth of reasons, I am a little obsessed with Ernest Hemingway. For one, I love his sense of adventure, which I find inspiring, although it more than often dangerous or irresponsible (in regards to the body, heart, and mind). In Australia last summer I read A Moveable Feast and The Snows of Kilimanjaro as I tried to apply his sense of adventure and style of writing to my time abroad. In preparation to go to Europe in the next 48 hours I recently finished The Sun Also Rises, and just started A Farewell to Arms. I’ve also been arbitrarily reading through a biography of Hemingway and Fitzgerald’s lives as writers. I know, I’m disgusting.

hemingway-gun1

Though I’ve used the premise as a lesson (when I taught high school English), I don’t know how good I am at the “Six Word Story” myself, which Hemingway legendarily made famous (even though he didn’t, probably). But I had the [not entirely original] idea to try something else: a six-word summary! Here are some six word summaries of classic literature. Warning: Spoilers of books you should have read in high school ahead.

The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald
Rich girls are usually shallow. Surprise!

The Old Man and The Sea by Ernest Hemingway
Awesome fish skeleton! Oh, I’m sorry…

Animal Farm by George Orwell
The Russian Revolution but way cuter.

1984 by George Orwell
Rats: still scary in the future.

The Catcher in The Rye by J.D. Salinger
Fear and loathing in New York.

The Autobiography of Benjamin Franklin
I’m sleazy, but I’m not lazy!

Hamlet by William Shakespeare, probably
“The Lion King” for fancy adults.

A Midsummer Night’s Dream by William Shakespeare, probably
Teenage love is a big joke.

The Sun Also Rises by Ernest Hemingway
Jews are obnoxious; Bullfighting is awesome.

“The Masque of the Red Death” by Edgar Allen Poe
Big party, you’re invited! We’re dead.

***

To be continued maybe someday, maybe. (That was a six-word cliff hanger)

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